Could happiness have more to do with who I am?
Sunday morning, I am slowly waking up by watching some show on Netflicks. I get a text from my son announcing someone else out bid him again. This was next house offers ending in disappointment. During this time there have been far more buyers than sellers resulting in the properties he has been seeking to have offers $20 to $30 thousand over asking price. Inspections and appraisals are now being waived in the offers by the buyers. The frenzy is building.
So, I respond half distracted by the show I am watching with a don’t worry this wasn’t your house. Just what any frustrated buyer wants to hear. I went on to talk about how you are putting too much weight on the purchase of this next house for your happiness and success. My coaching troupes flying as fast as I could type. Eventually the conversation dwindles and I start my meditation routine for the day. It begins with a reading. Today’s reading began with:
“Please remember, it is what you are that heals, not what you know” — attributed to Carl Jung
What is your source for happiness?
I read this quote after the fourth long winded text to my son. He had expressed his frustration in being told another house was lost to another bidder. The wise old man wanted to comfort him by teaching him what I had learned. I wanted to save him from bidding on a house he did not really want at an inflated price that he would later regret in an effort to end the search for a new home. I was giving him advice about how to deal with the disappointment and how to tell if a decision is adding to his happiness or will it be the source of his happiness. My thoughts about how I should have prepared him better for these types of experiences were stimulating me to accelerate and increase the teaching. As you can imagine, I was cramming a lot into these texts creating eye rolls.
I was telling him everything he didn’t need in that moment. What he needed was his Dad to get his frustration and to know he was loved. What I needed to get was his text was reaching out for his Dad, for who I am, flaws and all.
I wrote back: I want to give you an answer. My apologies. I hear your frustration and desire. I believe you will succeed. I would like to make it easier. I love you.
He responded: Now that’s a great text 😁
What would it be like to be there for someone? To come from who I am is what’s important, not what I know? What a gift. This is a source of my happiness.